Book of Boba is Terrible; but the Little Guys are Great

Spoilers up to Episode 5 of Boba Fett

The Book of Boba was always going to be a strange show. His gravitational pull is immense in the fan community. Anything focusing on a live action Boba would have been a mind blowing concept to explain to a 90’s Star Wars fan. At the time of writing I have watched episode five. Boba’s dream tank adventure is over and he is “completely healed” but not emotionally whatever the hell that means. The show is inconsistent. For as much as Boba talks he never really says anything. Not about himself, how he operates the world, any beliefs that he has; nothing. He is a AAA video game protagonist. There is only one real reason to watch this show, all the little guys.

Train Droid

First up is the Train Droid. This droid convinced me to stick with the show. Their spindly arms pulling the levers and turning knobs were reminiscent of BB-8 in The Last Jedi. The droid’s moments were extremely technical. He was a droid with an actual function instead of the Swiss Army R-series Astromech Droids. Whenever the droid would pop their head out, I wanted them to figure out a way to kill Boba with the train thruster. Once Boba entered the cockpit and confronted the droid I was worried we would lose my precious boy. Instead the engineer jumped out the window and crawled across the dune sea like a spider. I wish they showed up more in the show. My rework, every episode Boba would fight the Train Droid driving a different vehicle. But of course, the show is made by cowards.

Chef droid

While maybe not a little guy height wise, this droid was still the underdog. With six arms and six knives the chef droid might be one of the best food processors out there. However, as soon as they see Boba they are ready to fight. Channeling General Grievous, the droid spun the knives in a flurry of metal. Again I hoped this would somehow kill Boba even though it is another flashback. Unfortunately, the Chef is quickly disposed of by an actual cool character, Fennec.

Rat catcher

Straight from the Clone Wars was the Rat catcher. They are a LEP droid and it was an absolute joy to see this bunny boi in a live action Star Wars show. Their rabbit features even came to form with them scurrying around the kitchen on all fours. Pair that with rotating ears and you got the perfect little guy. Now I know it was impossible for this sweet droid to hurt anyone besides rats. Still, I wanted him to kill Boba. However, once they were caught by Boba instead of selling out their friends, they turned themselves off. Truly a real one.

BD

When Jedi Fallen Order came out BD-1 became one of my all time favorite droids. His mismatched eye lens along with those cute little legs felt so quintessentially Star Wars. Seeing a live action BD unit hanging around with Amy Sedaris was an absolute fucking treat. Sure it was almost womp rat lunch and that was distressing. He was also very handy while a little skittish. Sure he had a hard time aiming his flashing, but he was trying his best. That is all we should ask this little guy. Seeing his holographic abilities was also a wonderful treat to Fallen Order. BD is just a helpful little guy and I will protect him with my life.

Pit Droids

The Pit Droid triplets working for Amy Sedaris were a good time. Their bumbling slapstick antics have always gotten an easy chuckle out of me. Their movements are erratic and their disposition is almost a constant state of fear or panic. I just want to bop one on the nose and take them with me. It was nice to see the aesthetics and technology from the prequels showing up in modern Star Wars.

R5

When I was a kid, Star Wars action figures were a weird sort of commodity. Popular characters would often sell out. This is how fan favorite Dengar became a staple in the fan community. R5 was my bargain bin R2-D2 growing up. I love his pronounced neck and sharp edges that contrasted with the relative smoothness of R2. With him showing back up for Mando and Boba we get more scenes with this little red guy. The triple eyes are to die for. I would give everything to protect him, including replacing his bad motivator.

The Book of Boba is a bad show. The plot is inert. But the little guys, the little guys I will watch. Here’s to the little guys of Star Wars.

Bonus:

The multicolored Vespa's.

I fundamentally love them. They are bright, colorful and extremely dumb. The speeders are almost a perfect star wars vehicle. But not in your semi-gritty-crime ridden Boba Fett story.